SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't watched the episode yet and want to be surprised, don't read this article. Hopefully you realized what a "recap is" but we just wanted to be safe.
This week's South Park struck a chord with your correspondent. Do you or anyone you know find themselves playing "freemium" games such as Candy Crush for hours upon hours on their mobile phones? Our fiancé does. This week's episode gets right to the core of the issue.
Okay so our fiancé isn't actually the key demographic referenced during "Freemium Isn't Free." Although Trey Parker and Matt Stone make sure to point out that games such as the aforementioned Candy Crush are totally lame (we told you so hon), the episode revolves more around how such companies generated profits from this nonsense, such as when King Games went public during March for $22.50 a share. We're giving away the moral of this episode quickly, but much like other addiction-based industries, the hardcore users suffer the most when it comes to lame cell phone games. According to the real life stats presented, more than 80 percent of alcohol sales are done by those with drinking problems. "Freemium" content generates most of its profit in a similar method from its highest 1 percent of spenders.
Stan Marsh is the addict today, turned onto "Terrance and Phillip: Give Us Your Money," a massive freemium game being operated by the Canadian Department of Mobile Gaming in order to raise money for the nation's infrastructure...money ironically raised by selling Canadian coins to users who then spend them on digital infrastructure. Both the guys and Stan's parents question why he enjoys such a silly, wasteful "hobby," but it turns out Stan comes from a long line of addicts: His grandfather gambles incessantly at the nearby Native American casino and his father drinks heavily (although under the guise of being cultured).
Stan eventually seeks out help after dropping $26,000 on "Canadough" (which Randy pays off with his Lorde money...yeah...that storyline is still going). Jimmy has been working as a hustler for Canada in order to pay off his own gambling debts (we kind of wish it would have been Timmy...we would have called him "Pusha T"), and he recommends Stan seek out a higher power to confront his "demons." That higher power ends up being a demon itself: Satan appears to Stan and gives him a pretty accurate scientific explanation of dopamine release and how addiction risk can be genetic. When the master of temptation realizes that the Terrance and Phillip game was suspiciously lame (almost too lame), he realizes that his brethren the Canadian devil (Beezel-boot) must be behind it. The two hellions clash, destroying the Parliament building (not a too-soon reference to last's week's shootings...we promise) and order is restored. Stan and his grandpa take to dice-based adventure games...while Randy keeps on drinking.
OUR FAVORITE QUOTE: "We'd say we lost an arm and a leg but they aren't worth much." -Jimmy, explaining why crippled people say they "lost their crutches" when down a large sum of money. Cartman agrees this makes sense.
Check out the full episode at South Park Studios (which makes its money solely off advertising...you might still become addicted however).
