SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't watched the episode yet and want to be surprised, don't read this article. Hopefully you realized what a "recap is" but we just wanted to be safe.

Another week without major political incident and another week that heads for absurdity to get by. Not that we're complaining. Although last week's "Grounded Vindaloop" was a bit of stretch, the eyebrow-raising occurrences of "Cock Magic" are just as bizarre as the title makes it sound.

Don't worry...the "cock" mentioned in the title is a reference to male chickens. Mostly. Let's just say that this episode focuses most of its attention on 'Magic The Gathering.' And chickens playing it. How? The boys are talking up Kenny's "brutal" style of 'Magic' play when the school janitor overhears and invites them to see some "real" brutality. Turns out that illegal Cock Magic games are being played underneath City Wok on a weekly basis. If you interpret this to mean something other than roosters playing organized 'Magic The Gathering' matches against each other...we can't blame you. But that's exactly what happens. The boys realize that this is truly exciting competition and quickly purchase their own chicken to take part (affectionately named McNuggets). Soon they're dominating the amateur circuit and invited to participate in the big leagues...underneath the town Panda Express.

This is an episode where the side plots are definitely the highlights. Randy Marsh finds out, naturally, that the boys are taking part in Cock Magic and decides to revisit his former career in the field. Remember how we mentioned cocks mostly not being a reference to genitalia? Yeah. Let's just say Sharon reminds Randy this is what he got kicked out of college for. The highlight of the episode is definitely Randy performing at a birthday party, terrifying children by seemingly sawing his—we just had a thought...if we reference cocks as birds earlier, doesn't it seem silly to censor the same word when used in a different context later? Just saying—anyway yeah, he cuts it off. And then finds it behind one of the children's ears. Although police are called, Randy doesn't face any sincere investigation because, as you know, he "thought this was America."

Another theme running throughout the episode is the disrespect faced by female athletics. The girls volleyball team at South Park Elementary continues to beg students to come to its playoff games, only to be laughed off by the guys. It seems at first that Trey Parker and Matt Stone are selling the idea that 'Magic The Gathering' is more entertaining to watch than women's volleyball (it isn't) but a later scene shows the team playing more than competently (side note: NCAA women's volleyball is intense. Heading over to Atlanta to watch some this weekend. Not kidding). So who knows what, or if, we were supposed to take a message from this. The episode ends with the girls playing McNuggets (as he play 'Magic'), with a huge crowd gathered due to the chicken's presence. Who knows?

We had a call in the comment section last week for a Keystone Pipeline episode and we couldn't agree more (despite, you know, it already being voted down). There's a million ways to take that subject.

OUR FAVORITE QUOTE: "At one point Kenny even polymorphed the guy into a blue frog...it was total carnage." -Cartman, describing Kenny's match at a local comic book store. We're not sure if this is a shot at the intensity Wizards of The Coast fans put into their craft, but if there's actually a blue frog card, we'll consider giving it a try.

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