For something that doesn't really matter all that much, there are a whole lot of politics and outrage that go along with the inductees each year into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland. Every year, someone's favorite band gets snubbed, or someone's least favorite band somehow gets in, and everyone's feelings get hurt. Here's how I imagined the conversations went between the voters this year when they were deciding which artists to induct.
1. Peter Gabriel
"What about Phil Collins? I know we already inducted Genesis, but let's get Phil Collins in, by himself. He's great!"
"I don't know, we haven't inducted Peter Gabriel yet. If we let in Phil Collins before Peter Gabriel, people are going to flip out. You know how all those prog nerds get."
"Man, I don't even really like Peter Gabriel..."
"Come on, if we do Peter Gabriel this year, we can let Phil Collins in next year."
"Okay, fine, if we have to."
2. Hall & Oates
"For some reason, Hall & Oates has become cool."
"Yeah, I don't know why. Hipsters totally love Hall & Oates lately."
"Let's put Hall & Oates in there, then. Maybe hipsters will start liking us."
"Yeah, that makes sense."
"Okay, we got Rush out of the way last year, and this year we'll do Kiss. Now their fans can stop bugging us."
"Can UFO go in next year? I'm sick of Eddie Trunk's emails."
"Yeah fine, UFO next year. I'm sick of that guy, too."
"How about Nirvana?"
"You've been asking about Nirvana every year since 1995."
"Well check, has it been 25 years yet?"
"There's no way it's been 25...holy crap, they started 25 years ago. I feel old."
"Awesome, they're in!"
5. Linda Ronstadt
"All right, another woman for our "Women Who Rock" exhibit!"
"Yeah! Women do rock!"
"I think people forget that sometimes."
"Yeah, good thing we're here to remind everyone about that."
6. Cat Stevens
"I like Cat Stevens."
"Yeah, me too."
"If we induct him, do we get to call him Cat Stevens?"
"...I think so."
"I mean, is that politically correct? If we can't call him Cat Stevens, I don't know if we should do it. 'Yusuf Islam' rubs people the wrong way."
"Wait, do we have to induct Cat Stevens and Yusuf Islam separately? Are they considered two separate acts?"