The assault on Rihanna by Chris Brown may have happened over six years ago, but Brown still deals with the guilt and public shame of battering someone that he once loved. The aftermath of that night became so unbearable for the singer that he at one point contemplated suicide as he recently revealed in the trailer for his upcoming documentary, Welcome to My Life.
The "Back to Sleep" singer's mother, Joyce Hawkins described the 2009 incident against Rihanna as the worst day of her life and probably his life as well, according to EUR. The news of the couple's tumultuous relationship and the photos of the "Work, Work, Work" singer's badly beaten face completely saturated news mediums and blog sites, and affected Brown in the worst way possible.
During a 2009 interview with 20/20, Rihanna recounted the events that lead up to the assault recalling how the fight started when Brown received a text message from another woman while they were driving away from a Grammy Awards party, as reported by CNN.
"I couldn't take that he kept lying to me, and he couldn't take that I wouldn't drop it," she explained. "It escalated into him being violent towards me. And it was ugly...I was battered, I was bleeding, I was swollen in my face," she said.
The incident left the 26-year-old feeling like "a f*cking monster," as he explained in his upcoming documentary. During the three minute trailer Brown described how the ultimate goal for his career was to be a legend, and he was on his way to obtaining that title until the incident happened with his then 20-year-old girlfriend, Rihanna, that overshadowed his music and his talents and left former fans and supporters viewing him as the bad guy.
"I went from being on top of the world, [having] number one songs, and being kind of like America's sweetheart to being public enemy number one," explained Brown in the Welcome to My Life trailer.
There were moments in his life where he wanted to end it all and even considered suicide.
"I was thinking about suicide and everything else. I wasn't sleeping, I wasn't eating. I just was getting high," revealed Brown.
More accounts of the night's assault will be addressed in the upcoming documentary, which as of now has no official release date.
